Ben and Jen over? Not so fast!

Posted Monday, September 15, 2003 at 1:24 PM Central

by John Couture

Leave it to Silent Bob to speak up about the status of Ben and Jen's relationship.

Sunday was supposed to be the grandest Hollywood wedding of them all. A wedding that would rival the British Royals in terms of sheer media coverage. But alas, Sunday came and went without Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez being in the same state, let alone walking down the aisle hand-in-hand.

According to reports, Ben spent the day in Las Vegas with another woman, while J Lo took a dip in the ocean off Miami. Of course, the media has had a field day speculating about the demise of Hollywood's power couple. Many reports claim sources close to the pair indicate that Ben broke it off for good. Other "sources" argue that J Lo kicked the womanizing Affleck to the curb.

The truth, however, might be a little more pedestrian. Kevin Smith, who admitted on his website that he went so far as to be fitted for a tux for his role in the wedding, defended his friends. "Wednesday night, I was up at their place, watching Dirty Pretty Things (they've got a sweet-[expletive deleted] 35mm theater in their house) and they looked and sounded pretty far from broken up to me. And mind you, that was the day they called off the wedding. Maybe folks are reading a little too much into the fact that Jen's in Miami and Ben's not at the moment."

Whatever the status of their relationship, one thing is clear. They are tired of the constant media attention and there's very little they can do about it. Perhaps the best solution is to grab those three decoy brides, hop on a private plane and land somewhere in North Dakota and run to the closest church. Now that would teach those paparazzi a lesson.