Has 'Star Wars' lost its luster?
Posted Tuesday, August 12, 2008 at 3:12 PM Central
by John Couture
Psst. Hey, guess what? There's a new Star Wars movie opening up this weekend. Pass it on.
If you're reading this and getting pangs of despair as the result of being blind-sided by this news, you're not alone. There are no lines at the nation's multiplexes to trumpet in George Lucas' latest space opera masterpiece (yep that was as hard to type as it was to read).
Now, the big question is why?
In 1999, you would've thought that the second coming of the iPhone was upon us with reports of people camping not simply over night, but in some cases months ahead of Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace's theatrical bow. The lines were understandably shorter for Star Wars: Episode II - Attack Of The Clones and nearly non-existent for Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith.
There's an old saying on Tatooine. I know it's on Coruscant, probably also on Tatooine. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, call me a Trekkie.
And so it was with heavy hearts that many Star Wars fans had to concede that George Lucas lost something between the original Star Wars trilogy and the lackluster prequel trilogy. I wouldn't call it an outright coup d'etat, more like a Jar Jar backlash.
And so began the Dark Jedi ages. And then, there was a single ray of hope on the horizon and then two.
A brand new animated TV series about the Clone Wars and a new live-action TV series based on the period between the two trilogies. Ah, Luke and Leia's Degrassi moments will finally be revealed.
So, much like the spark of hope in the rebel alliance, the faithful believed that perhaps, finally, George Lucas was poised to atone for his sins.
Fool me three times, take away my light saber.
All hope was quickly squashed though when the trailer for Star Wars: The Clone Wars started to make its rounds. Where was the cool animation style from Star Wars: Clone Wars Volume 1, the Genndy Tartakovsky series that bridged the last two theatrical films? And who in their right mind would think that a storyline involving the kidnapping and rescue of Jabba the Hutt's kid is what we, as fans, were looking for?
Ah, look at that cute Huttette. I don't think so. Here's a thought for you, imagine two Hutts procreating. Yep, you're welcome. You won't be able to erase that image from your mind all day.
But, it gets worse. In a move that may usurp Jar Jar Binks as the most despised creation ever to originate from George Lucas' mind, the trailer introduces Star Wars fans to Ahsoka Tano, Anakin's padawan apprentice. Think a hip teeny bopper more apt to text her BFF than to wield a light saber.
It would be like inducting Paris HIlton into Mensa.
And a collective groan was let out across the galaxy, far, far away.
You dig a little deeper and notice that only Christopher Lee, Samuel L. Jackson and Anthony Daniels are returning to lend their voices to the film and presumably the off-shoot series. Well that sucks, no more Hayden Christensen as a young Darth Vader? Wait a minute, that might be a selling point of the movie.
And then the negative reviews started to hit the web despite Warner Bros.' best efforts to keep them off the Internets until at least Friday. Heck, even the affable, usual studio shill Harry Knowles blasted this movie on his Star Wars failure played out on the big screen. Of course, this failure may have bigger repercussions than the new trilogy.
As much as we bashed the new trilogy, it didn't stop us from showing up in droves and helping to line Lucas' pockets with enough cash to give him the bright idea that it was time for a Geriatric Jones movie.
However, this thud just might be the final nail in the Star Wars coffin.
If the movie bombs (as expected) and even goes so far as to turn off potential TV series viewers, then it's a good bet that the animated series will be swiftly canned. Once the animated series is shelved, it's a pretty good bet that the more expensive live-action series will never see the light of day.
So, there's the rub. Do you go to support an inferior product based upon brand loyalty and the hope that George Lucas will someday recapture the lightning in that bottle that was the original trilogy, or is it time to cut bait and hop onto the Enterprise's bandwagon?
Well, at least we would have one thing to look forward to if the animated series is able to survive to its conclusion. I think it's safe to say that Ahsoka's omission from Revenge of the Sith is a pretty good indication that she will probably meet the business end of light saber at some point in this series.
George Lucas is brilliant. He's finally giving us the Jar Jar payoff. Create a character even worse than Jar Jar and kill her off in a most hideous and cathartic fashion. Of course, knowing Lucas Ahsoka will conveniently be somewhere else during the events of Revenge of the Sith and won't be killed off.
Time to dust off the magic Dagobah Crystal Ball. I'm predicting a major backlash. The Force isn't strong with this movie. I predict that it will only gross $55 million at the box office. My colleague Tim has a little more faith in the project and thinks it will bring in $77 million.
What do you think? How much will Star Wars: The Clone Wars make at the box office? Also, what do think of George Lucas continually going to the Star Wars well? Is he beating a dead horse or are there more interesting stories out there? What do you want to see in a Star Wars movie/TV series? Give us your input.
